The Gratitude List

I was hearing an interesting motivational speaker last week with a focused discussion on the essence of gratitude.  Although many of us hear about how having more of this incrementally will help generate a greater fulfilling and happy life, many people may have a hard time with how to begin to incorporate adding it on a consistent basis.  When you think about what a gratitude list can look like, I believe that one can begin with being thankful for the most basic of things, as your attitude toward having an abundant life is born from there.  Even if your list begins with writing on a small post-it note square, then that is a great beginning compared to not having a list at all.  As I continued listening to the speaker, she touched upon the fact that sometimes we have people in our lives that cause us consternation because of their oppressive nature.  She advised the audience that sometimes one has to at least be grateful that that they are not that person with that type of disposition.  Since I have had my share of experiences with these types of individuals through-out my life I had to laugh out loud and smile, as I knew that what she was saying was very true.  We never know why people treat others with disdain or have a negative attitude that is all consuming.  Perhaps they can justify to themselves that they are holding others accountable, however, the intent behind their actions always speaks to the real truth.  Over the course of my lifetime, I have learned that distance between myself and those types people is a must, because I no longer have to be a willing participant to their antics.  I do get filled with  a feeling of sadness towards these folks, as their potential may not ever be fully realized due to their disposition.  When people have to strike out at others first and live a life of defensiveness, it makes me wonder what happened in their life that caused this reaction to be considered normal.  The behavior of these people always reminds me of school bullies, who at their core were sad and vulnerable outside of their masked anger towards others.  The other point that was brought up in this discussion was that sometimes you will never be able to change others.  However, one can certainly change their mindset regarding those types of people.  If one looks with diligence, anyone can find the right things to be grateful for. Through out my life, I have learned different lessons on gratitude which came in various shapes and sizes.  Because of my chosen disposition, I am even more thankful for the smallest of things that can bring a smile to my face.  I can consider my life filled with abundance that enables me to feel fulfilled and I can step back during any part of a given day to recognize where these instances carve a memorable moment of contemplation for me.  Among the challenges is to have and seek gratitude during trying circumstances because it is then that one has to look for those kernels of appreciation that sometimes are so buried in a given day, that it made makes you wonder if your supply has run out.  As with all things little by little, the revelation of those many examples of why that particular day had those worthwhile moments will shine in the midst of any darkness to show you that the path you are on, is in fact the right one.  We must never forget that through the course of being grateful for the smallest of things, we can learn to realize a life that is filled with more inner peace and filled with those important items that ultimately matter most to us.

Begin With The Root

I heard somebody speaking on a television program a few days ago discussing the type of attitudes we all have when we deal with a particular problem.  Although there were several theories tossed about our ability to endure or overcome issues, the last question that was posed was the most enlightening of all.  The question was, is our problem the real issue or is it our attitude about our problem that really weighs us down?  This was such a deep an impacting thought as the final course in the conversation, because it reinforced my own beliefs about it, as I have spoken on several occasions about having a grateful attitude despite what you happen to be facing.  Yet, when you think about the simplicity of the question, it got to the root of what is usually the biggest dilemma that we all face in overcoming any life issues.  Our attitude about our own issues can usually upstage everything, because we can all fall into feeding our ego's first, when we become our own worst enemy as opposed to dealing with the actual problem.  When we allow ourselves to be the one's at the center of the stage for whatever the issue is, it becomes less about the problem that we may be facing and more about how we look in other people's eyes.  I know that I have had my own issues at times of trying to resolve something that I had very little or no control over, which ultimately made me feel less capable because of my prior need to feed my ego.  Needless to say, the consequences of this type of thinking always falls short of providing for the best resolutions.  If you think about a scientist who has worked for many years on a hypothesis and then devoted even more time to trials before getting to an actual solution, there was a significant amount of time that was devoted to just preparation.  Similarly, we need to do our own due diligence in devoting time to doing homework in resolving issues, otherwise we end up with a mediocre response that may ultimately yield poor results.   Worse yet, we may even repeat the trial if we failed to learn the lesson.  What has seemed to work the best in my own experience is to take myself out of the equation and simply look at things with the most simple uncomplicated view of the whole situation.  When we get beyond ourselves in the state of problem solving and address items at face value, we then begin to see what the possibilities may be without the distraction of having ourselves to contend with.  Don't worry about how things will look like to others or what the perception of people may be, as those things are ultimately unimportant and ego centered.  If you have the right people around you, then you don't have to worry about the other noises that may come from those that add little value to your life.  Also, the act of self forgiveness can be key, in order to get rid of any guilt or self doubt that should have been removed a long time ago. Remember that in all things you need to let  go of your ego, as it does not serve a positive purpose.  Ultimately, you will be able to face any hurdle with a clearer conscience and the ability to look for the root of a problem, instead of spending excessive time on questioning why.  Focusing on issues in their most simple form, with the right attitude can ultimately yield more positive results while providing you with the added bonus of having more peace of mind.