Living Benchmarks

Accomplishment in one's life can be seen as milestones or even benchmarks that define your success.  Similar to a timeline that has notches at given places to signify the step that was achieved, we can work towards a living benchmark that constantly moves to define what your definition of success is.  When we talk about things that we aspire to do, they stay in the abstract until you actually put energy, planning and action behind it.  When you look back at where you were ten years ago, I am sure most people can pick those spots that were filled with achievement.  Likewise, if you can remember the locations of where you had some trials, you could probably see the measures of growth that came afterwards.  What we never realize until much later is how much a challenge was that created the ability for us to grow exponentially.  Most people can get stuck on why they failed at something or perhaps focus too much on being stretched to the point of being broken, as opposed to what positive results came from that.  Life as such, has a wonderful mixture of  lessons that are filled with good times along with others that are filled with opportunities if you decide to look at them that way.  Ideally, there are small steps that should be taken towards the direction that you want to arrive at.  Just remember all change may be uncomfortable at first, however, think of that feeling as your catalyst of energy that is propelling you forward.  At times we can lose track of the many achievements that did take place in our lives, perhaps because they may not have seemed to large.  Similar to New Year's Eve, when people contemplate what transpired over the last year and look towards hope and prosperity in the future, we should all be more diligent about having that thoughtful reflection more often.  Don't wait for a holiday or other special occasion to take stock of where you are.  Get in the habit of doing it more often and think of the many things you have achieved in your life benchmarks, that are the building blocks of what you consider success to be for your life.  

Life Lessons

I was thinking about the power of words earlier today, when I thought about some of the great speakers that I have had the privilege to hear.  Among them John Maxwell, Jack Canfield and Joyce Meyer to name a few.  I can recall being mesmerized by them and feeling that I wanted to do a version of what they did in the future.  Although I have been a witness to many powerful speakers, I quickly thought about what was my first memory of myself speaking in public.  For that I would have to regress to the fifth grade and a school competition reciting the American's Creed.  It was a competition within the classroom, however, I vividly remember it being a popularity contest more so than anything.  I had always been good at memorizing and although I could get nervous speaking in front of a group, I could rely on the fact that I would remember my lines when push came to shove.  I had practiced for many days prior to the competition and the teacher was recording our speeches with a tape recorder.  When I completed my speech, I felt that I had done a pretty good job in my delivery and the rest of the class agreed as they had voted for me as the best in the delivery of the speech.  However, one of the most popular boys in the class had gone before me and he forgot his lines several times and laughed his way through the end.  Upon the conclusion of our competition, the popular classmate begged the teacher for a do-over and she bowed down to his request as the class wanted him to do it again.  The second time was much better, however, he still giggled his way through parts of the speech.  Then it came down to the class deciding on who would win and they overwhelmingly chose the more popular kid.  I received some type of certificate for coming in second, however, it was one of those times that I realized that their are intangible reasons for a person to win a competition and that life is not always fair.  It was a great lesson for me to learn, as it made me realize that I needed to be even better if I wanted to compete against someone with popularity as a deciding factor.  I decided then that I would have to be that much better so there would be no question about a contest given similar circumstances.  Even though I may have lost in the eyes of my peers, I actually won by learning from what this lesson taught me.  Over the course of my career, I have had many more opportunities to sharpen my skills in this area and although I do feel much more comfortable in that role, I still do my homework and practice in order to ensure that I reach a level of expectation that I can live with.  Lessons come in many disguises and for the most part, you may not realize that you are learning something new or that your personal growth is about to expand.  My suggestion is that if you find yourself in the middle of a lesson, get centered and listen to what your heart tells you.  Be thoughtful about your next steps and have faith in yourself that you are capable of achieving what is in front of you and more.  The other lesson is about being popular, I found that this is temporary in nature and harnessing the power of words can last a lifetime.

Generosity Always Returns

I wrote about a lady and her lucky penny not too long ago and the moral to her story was that the value of something was in the eye of the beholder.  Interestingly enough last week I was at a meeting and as we were getting under way, one of the people I was talking with had just arrived a bit late.  As he sat down he apologized and then he quickly walked around the conference table and was giving everyone a penny.  I internally laughed a bit, because I thought here we go again.  Except when I received the penny from the gracious gentleman, it had a carved cross in the middle of it as if someone had cut it out.  He explained that he knew a pastor that made these and gave them out as a form of outreach in his ministry.  Everyone around the table was immediately taken by it and one person liked it so much that she put it on her gold chain that she was wearing in front of us.  I admired the workmanship and was completely fulfilled by not only the gesture, in addition, by the way it made me feel.  I had images that came to my head about the lady that I had helped get her lucky penny and how much she appreciated someone assisting her to retrieve it.  In an instant I thought about an act of kindness and how that action usually creates a reciprocal reaction.  Generosity knows no bounds and when you do something out of the goodness of your heart or with the best of intentions, there is a chain reaction that is set in motion.  People always say that giving is better than receiving and until you feel what this is like, it can be an ambiguous thought.  However, when you become the recipient of such an action, you can immediately feel the power and strength behind such actions or intentions.  That afternoon as I concluded the meeting, I leaned over to the person that gave me my penny and I thanked him for his thoughtfulness and kindness.  We all left our meeting with a smile along with a pep in our step, as we emanated in the goodness of this person who made our day.  The next time you contemplate giving of yourself or making a contribution towards someone or something else, don't think about it too long.  My suggestion is to go with your gut instinct and proceed accordingly.  What is in your heart's best intentions will ultimately make its way back to you and fill you up with a dose of positive, enlightened and happy energy that no amount of money could buy.  

Intentions & Motives

I am sharing my new column that will be published next month.

Inventing Your Life

“Intentions & Motives”

By

Rob Claudio

I read an article recently about a woman who was diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer and was given the prognosis of having very little time left following her medical results.  Although the subject matter may sound like it was a depressing article, it actually was one of the most positive and inspiring articles that I have read in some time.  The woman had the best disposition about her circumstances, considering what the ramifications were as a result of her diagnosis.  She decided to tell her family to not make a fuss over the situation and asked them to instead do something nice for somebody else, then come back and tell her about it.  Her decision to proceed with her version of holistic medicine that could aid in her condition with hearing about good deeds was life changing not only for her but for the people that she ended touching all around the world.  Her story made it to a website; www.caringbridge.org, which is a website dedicated to supporting people on their health journey. The examples of what people did ran the spectrum from buying groceries for a needy family, to helping an elderly person financially and giving someone a hug in her honor.  Her request manifested far beyond her immediate circle and it became a worldwide effort.  The other piece to this was that although her prognosis was not good, she kept living far beyond what her medical doctor’s expectations were.  At one point she told her family that it was the many great deeds that people were doing that were keeping her alive.  The daughter of this individual was so involved with this new found passion for good deeds, that she dedicated her time to helping start a website that was dedicated globally to hear about the many stories of people that had done positive things for others.  The site is; www.gratitude.crowdmap.com and it tracks gratitude efforts globally.  Although this inspiring person did end up passing away due to her illness, it was two years after her terminal diagnosis.  The amount of time that she was able to live was far beyond what was ever expected considering her condition.   When you think about it, if you had the last two years of your life filled with nothing but great stories demonstrating the good in people all over the world, I would imagine that it would be validating to think that the rest of the globe was actually not that bad of a place after all.  It is inspiring to see what people can do to change the direction of not only their own lives, but those of others as well.  If you have the ability to go beyond someone else’s expectations for your own life, you can also have an impact that may be the chain reaction that was needed for others to change their purpose and destiny.  Think about the things that you do or the words that you say to yourself along with the intent behind them.  Ask yourself what your motives are behind the words that you use.  If you don't like the answers to some of your responses, then think about how you will change your motives to achieve a different outcome.  Give yourself a chance to create a positive result in your life, by doing things with the best of your intentions behind them.  Whenever you have a moment of self-doubt or think about not pursuing what you started, think about the person who willed good among others whose name was Joan Z. Lewis and changed other people's destinies along with her own.

               

“Good intentions might sound nice,

but it's positive actions that matter.”

-Tim Fargo

A Good Laugh And A Long Nap

I saw a quote that caught my attention earlier this week that captivated my thinking for some time afterwards.  It alluded to the fact that sometimes we just need some levity in our lives along with a nice nap afterwards to feel happy and content.  I immediately thought about being in kindergarten class in elementary school, where we actually took a nap as part of our daily curriculum.  I remember I was one of those kids that could not nap and when we went through this ritual on a daily basis, I would put my head down on the desk, close my eyes and begin to daydream.  As an adult, I now think about a nap as possible respite to a long and busy day or week, which is a luxury if one has the privilege of doing it.  What I find now are the simple things in life that can bring a lot of comfort and relief to an otherwise chaotic life existence.  When I think about the things that make me smile or laugh, there are so many places now via social media that can aid anyone who may have been struggling for a moment of simple joy.  There are a multitude of videos that follow a funny cat, laughing baby, cute dog, or other entity that can instantly bring a smile to your face and let you forget about any pressing thing in your life.  Sometimes it is an inspiring picture or the words of someone that can make you chuckle, which serve as a reminder that life doesn't have to feel so weighted on one's shoulders.  An interesting aspect to attracting more of what you want to your life, is that it does begin to manifest itself on a more consistent basis and all of sudden you realize that there are many moments that are then filled with the things that you wanted.  Whether it is more happiness, joy or inner peace to name a few, one can begin to live a life at any time that can be tailored to enhance such aspirations.  You just has to be diligent about the things that you want in your life and speak along with write the words that you want to self fulfill.  Don't be detracted by any naysayers, as there are many people in this world who live to see others fail at something, while they await the opportunity to tell you "I told you so".  Those are not the people that you need around you and if there is any negativity coming towards you from anyone, learn to filter those individuals out.  In the long run, you will be heading towards and achieving the things that you really want out of your life, if you remain true to your purpose and destiny.  Remember that the simplest of things that can bring the most joy and followed by a light nap afterwards may be a recipe worth passing to others.  

Pieces Of A Puzzle

People experience enough varied emotions through out their lives that they can be documented by the interval periods, when times were either up or down.  This again is based upon the perspective of the person.  I have always found that there are many people who felt that being at a low period in their life was simply an opportunity for something better to occur shortly thereafter.  If you saw your life as a large collage of pieces that were carefully put together over time, up close you could see all of the fragments of every item that was part of you which may not necessarily fit evenly with the other pieces.  However, when you step back from looking at all of the different shaped and constructed fragments, you then clearly see a large picture that came together as a result of all of the many segments.  With time and experience we learn to look forward to the many happy periods which occur, while we acknowledge the more difficult stages that made us grow and gave us a new perspective.  If you can recall your younger days when perhaps your parents bought you a jigsaw puzzle, when you looked at the many different shapes that were in that box, it contained very well constructed items that fit together evenly and smoothly once properly connected.  It would be great if one could document their life via a smooth well polished puzzle, yet, we know that in life we are made up of the many rough and not so well finished portions that can document our life story.  I know that we cannot go back to re-do history where we now know we could have done something differently that would have created a different outcome for us.  As I look at the many years behind me, I can smile about the mistakes that taught me a hard lesson, while I rejoice in the other stages that were filled with happiness and contentment.  The next time you think about the many wonderful pieces of your life that make-up the great complexity of who you are, I hope you think of the jagged pieces of your puzzle with fondness, as they are what gave you character and definition.  As your life journey continues and you add more fragments to a well lived life, think about your perspective of the many little pieces.  Don't focus on each of the small items that may not fit together so well polished.   Instead focus and step back far enough, so that you can see the complete and wonderful picture that was created as a result of the many segments that are part of your complete life.