Today I was hearing a speaker talk about not letting other people's choices steal your joy.  Whether you are a parent dealing with a child's choices, or you are a sibling and have other family members whose choices have affected you, your personal happiness should not be preempted as a result.  There a are many instances when one feels responsible in helping a family member in need because of a difficult situation.  At the end of the day, the person who got themselves into that predicament has to be held responsible for their actions.  As such, we can play the role of supporter, listener and sometimes guide, however, we have to walk a fine line in not being an enabler.  There are examples of how people have gone above and beyond what their role was in order to help a sibling, friend or child in need.  Sometimes siblings act as parents as a result of these situations and in actuality that is not their role.  At other times there is a role reversal and the parent may be acting irresponsibly and the children take on the parenting role.  It is also not a child's role to be a parent.  These situations bring unintended consequences such as hidden anger and resentment for the settings people were unnecessarily placed in. The responsibility in changing or addressing one's choices have to do with the person who made those decisions to begin with.  The support may weaken or dissipate from a family member or friend if the person does not change and continues their destructive behavior.  Although we have a certain amount of responsibility to help someone in need, it does not have to occur at the expense of losing one's own personal joy.  Let others be accountable for their behavior and set parameters for you to not be taken advantage of.  Seeking a balanced life filled with as much happiness as one deserves means that one should not sacrifice personal joy as a result of the poor actions of someone else.